Pro Parenting Tip #48: Tap into Mirror Neurons
“Do as I say, not as I do.”
I often hear parents say this jokingly because they know how ridiculous it is.
But they still do it!
We yell at our kids to make them stop yelling, snatch something out of their hands because they took it from someone, call them names them for being disrespectful, and talk over them to make them listen.
Logically, it doesn't make sense.
Biologically, it just doesn't work.
Dr. Rizzolatti and his research team uncovered a fascinating insight in the 1990s: our brains fire neurons not only when we perform an action but also when we observe it. Termed "mirror neurons," this phenomenon reveals how seeing an action triggers our brains to replicate it.
They called this phenomenon mirror neurons.
When we see someone scowl, tense up, posture over us, become agitated...it signals our brain to do the same.
When we watch someone do something the wrong way, it strengthens our neural pathway for doing it the wrong way too.
It’s like watching a video of Michael Jordan missing a jump shot over and over again. Or Simone Biles falling off the balance beam.
Our brain doesn’t learn to avoid that behavior, it becomes more wired to do it.
Instead, our brains need to observe the RIGHT way.
How does this apply to you and your teen you ask?
If you want your teen to calm down, interact with them calmly.
If you want them to respect you, treat them with respect.
If you want them to listen to you, listen to them.
If you want them to trust you, trust them.
It's remarkably simple yet profoundly impactful.
THE BOTTOM LINE
Your teen's mirror neurons instinctually reflect what they see and feel. Take heed of the behaviors you're reflecting back to them; they're shaping more than you might realize.
MIRROR A MORE POSITIVE VIBE
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